4 Quotes That Prove Video Game Characters are Smarter than Politicians

Video games get a lot of flak for being a soft form of entertainment, for them providing very little in the way of educational content or even stuff that makes you think of anything more than “Hmmm, I wonder how many flashbangs I could throw at that terrorist before he literally collapsed of a mechanically induced seizure”. Characters from video games also get criticised for being impossibly unrealistic representations of the human form or for being huge dicks, so to combat that, here are 4 quotes that show that some video game characters are pretty damn smart.

“Right and wrong are not what separate us and our enemies. It’s our different standpoints, our perspectives that separate us. Both sides blame one another. There’s no good or bad side. Just two sides holding different views.” – Squall Leonhart – Final Fantasy VIII.

If an American politician came out with a line like this, he’d be bludgened to death with a hail of fire extinguishers before the front row could tear his dick off for daring to suggest that BIN LADEN WAS RIGHT HURR DURR!

Squall has so perfectly encapsulated the route of all human hostility here that if you copy/paste the above quote into a plagiarism detector it would technically be considered the exact opposite of the bible.

squall-leonhart

“We do have a lot in common. The same Earth, the same air, the same sky. Maybe if we started looking at what’s the same instead of what’s different… well, who knows.” – Meowth – Pokemon.

Though the character Meowth is unique to the Pokemon anime, you can catch a Meowth in the Pokemon game, so I’m going to let this one slide, sue me.

Racism, misogyny and being a huge flaccid dick to other people just because they’re different in some way is so common online the word “fag” is considered a suffix on some parts of the internet. We used to have laws specifically tailored for keeping down people with an all year sun tan and are only just repealing laws deigned to fuck over people who like rubbing two of the same kinds of genitals together. And a cartoon cat understands why this is retarded. Yeah, we suck.

Meowth

“War is when the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other.” – Niko Bellic – Grand Theft Auto 4.

There are more quotes about war than there are Justin Bieber fans and most of them are equally as depressing and full of shit. True to his straight talking nature, when talking about war Niko aims straight at the face, or the balls depending on how big of a dick you were when playing the game.

The last person to sum up the brutality of war this succinctly was the guy who shit himself while watching the Saving Private Ryan premiere. Look it up!

Niko Bellic

“Faith in money will lead you nowhere” – Leon Kennedy – Resident Evil 4.

Remember when the people running our banks basically fucked the entire world because they were all money grabbing nut sacks? Then went right ahead and all got millions of pounds in payments while thousands of people went bankrupt?

Maybe if those people had all played Resident Evil 4 they would have realised that being obsessed with money is a sure-fire way to get yourself hit in the face with a rocket launcher round.

Leon Kennedy

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